Pros and cons of unemployment

So you’ve lost your job.

Or graduated from school and haven’t found one yet.  (Pick me, pick me!)

Unemployment gives you opportunity to reflect on your jobless status: the good, the bad, and the ugly.  So here’s my list of good and bad things about being out of work.

The Cons of Being Unemployed

  • no money to do anything, including going to Frenchys (oh the horror!)
  • long distance phone numbers on the caller ID (you know why)
  • no excuse for downing copious amounts of coffee
  • weekends are the same as weekdays, thus no longer as exciting (in fact, they are a bit disappointing because no employers will call you on these days)
  • spending your spare time typing cover letters for any possible jobs including part-time rocket scientist
  • unnatural obsession with all the job sites
  • people ask “Got a job yet?”
  • you seriously consider going to Timbucktu for paid employment
  • kids who work at fast f0od restaurants are cooler than you are because they have gainful employment
  • no excuse to be tired at 6PM
  • no reason for a Blackberry, cell phone, or calendar
  • no cool position to put in your Facebook profile
  • feeling like a lazy Atlantic Canadian have not bum
  • worrying your Gmail is getting snagged by potential employer’s e-mail filters
  • little reason to put on makeup to surf the net
  • RRSP? Pension Plan?
  • a sense of feeling incomplete
  • your Liberal Arts degree is fulfilling the stereotype of being useless in the job market

The Pros of Unemployment

  • sleeping until lunchtime without missing a thing
  • walking around in your jammies at 2 in the afternoon
  • not having to book a day off work to go see the doctor or dentist
  • doing whatever you want whenever you want
  • ample time to catch up on your housework
  • freedom to paint your room
  • not answering to The Man
  • no gossiping co-workers
  • no income tax!
  • staying up late to read
  • unmitigated writing time!
  • you and your cat are getting to know each other better
  • not putting any kilometres on your car
  • you don’t have to put on any makeup to surf the internet
  • dreaming your next job will pay you $50K

    You have lots of time to sit and take in the air.
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