Survey silliness (because it’s hard to come up with daily posts!)

When’s the last time you ran? Um, next question.

Do your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them? No, but the fabric is thisclose to tearing. I squat before I go out in public to make sure they’re not going to rip.

What are you dreading right now? Paying bills.

Do you get the full 8 hours of sleep a night? And then some. I loves me some sleep. Naps too.

Who last grabbed your ass? I can’t remember; it’s been that long.

Have you ever been on your school’s track team? Gosh no. Unless I were the waterboy.

Do you own a pair of Converse? No.

Did you copy and paste this survey? No, I retyped it all for sheer fun.

Do you eat raw cookie dough? All the time. It’s the best part of baking.

Have you ever kicked a vending machine? Wanted to, though.

Don’t you hate it when the radio ruins good songs by playing them over and over? This is why I don’t listen to the radio. (Though ironically, I listen to the same CDs over and over. I guess there’s just no advertisements.)

Do you watch Trading Spaces? I used to. Is that show still running?

How do you eat oreos? I split them apart, then eat the plain chocolate one first. I save the frosted side for last.

Could you live without a computer? No, because my mental health would deteriorate to the point I’d become a crazy cat lady and live in fluffy pink slippers.

Do you wear your shoes in the house? Rarely. Sometimes I wear flipflops if I’m baking or on my feet a long time. But my feet love to be free.

Who or what sleeps with you? Jack. And a teddy bear.

At what age did you find out that Santa wasn’t real? I forget, but I denied it for a long time, thinking I’d lose out on the Santa presents. Turns out, you don’t.

How many phones, house phones and cell phones are in your house? Working: 6. Not working: 13.

Who would you call first if you won the lottery? EVERYONE.

Last time you saw your best friend? It’s been awhile, but I talked to her on the phone the other night.

What jewelry are you wearing? None. Unlike the man I saw at Zellers today wearing a ring on every finger. Ick.

What’s the first thing you do when you get online? Check Facebook.

Do you watch Grey’s Anatomy? Yes. And usually cry.

How do most people spell your name? They usually get my last name wrong.

What are you doing tomorrow? NOTHING. It’s Sunday. Sundays are for nothing.

Will you keep your last name when you get married? I think so. Not that I’m getting married any time soon.

When was the last time you left your house? Today. For Bridgewater. To get a present for my niece’s first birthday.

Do you return your cart? To the cart corral, yes.

Do you have a dishwasher? It’s me.

What noise do you hear? The A/C in all it’s gloriousness.

Would you survive in prison? I’m a princess. So no.

Do you know anyone with the same name as you? I do actually and I found her on Facebook!

What’s the last thing you purchased? A new bra and pair of capris. Summer clothes are now on sale. Yeehaw!

What brand are your pants right now? Is Frenchy’s a brand?

Ever been to Georgia (the state)? No. But I’ve petted Georgia the dog.

What irritates you most on the internet? Trolls.

What brand is your digital camera? Canon.

Do you watch movies with your parents? Yes.

Do you own expensive perfume/cologne? Yuck no. Gives me headaches.

Are you taking college classes right now? I wish. I miss university and feel the need to get a M.Ed.

Do you like sushi? Meh. Vegetarian is okay.

Do you get your hair cut every month? No. Every year, usually.

Do you go online everyday? Do fish swim? I don’t know what I would do without my fix.

Things that befuddle me (sadly, there are many)

Perhaps I can blame it on those philosophy courses I took in university. Philosophy can really mess a person up. I still don’t know if something is moving or if that’s actually a line. (And what if the world is just made up of my perceptions and doesn’t really exist?)

Some things puzzle me. Maybe you can help me out by responding to my questions and concerns. That way I’ll sleep better tonight. I mean, I sleep like the dead anyway, but I’m sure I would sleep more soundly having some of these things cleared up.

Why is grilled meat 600% better than any other kind of cooked meat?

• Why is almond milk called “milk” when there is no lactating involved? Wouldn’t ground up almond liquid be more accurate?

• If cars are never allowed to go faster than 110 legally, why are they made to go 200 km/r?

• Why does my cat hate expensive toys and prefer cheap things like pajama strings, yarn bits, and balls of his own fur?

• On the subject of cats, why is catnip okay, but marijuana illegal?

• Why do they bother putting those chewy candies in the can of Quality Street? Can’t they include more of those purple ones?

• If you get your coffee in a travel mug, why does the coffee shop sometimes waste a paper cup measuring out the amount before they put it into the reusable container?

• If you get paid minimum wage, why can’t you put in minimum effort?

• Why do people say snow tires cost too much money when summer tires/all seasons last twice as long?

• How do governments and companies expect the economy to improve when educated people are getting paid $10 an hour, the same wage a 16-year-old gets paid to squeeze the special, pre-measured sauce onto a burger?

• If I buy a can of sodium-reduced soup, why does it still have 10,500 milligrams of salt in it?

• Do gerbils go to heaven? And if they do, are their amputated tails there waiting for them?

• When I see my local weather is being delivered by a “weather specialist” is that code for “not a meteorologist”? And is that person qualified to point at a green screen and read a Teleprompter? Does this mean I can go to a “tooth specialist” to get a root canal?

• How can politicians work for a couple of years, then get a pension for life? Why can’t this be the same for the rest of us?

I’m an educated person, but sometimes, things just confuse me. I think it’s because I dyed my hair blonde once.

Some of them already put in the minimum effort.